Losing a Grandma

The world lost one of the best grandmas today. Jordan’s Grandma Jone lost a brief but valiant fight against cancer. One dose of chemo not only destroyed the bad stuff, it destroyed all of her good stuff. Cancer sucks so much.

We lucked out in the Grandma department for tons of reasons. The biggest reason was because Jordan and her brother, Cameron, were their Grandma’s heart. The kids meant so much to her. Just months after Cameron was born, Jone was able to retire from work. This made it possible for her to attend every dance recital along with dozens of soccer, football and baseball games. When there was a special event, she made sure it she could be there or support it in some way. She and Poppy stayed with the kids almost every time we needed to go out of town. Grandma has always been the kids’ go to person besides their mom and dad. She was a non-stop source of love and support to the kids. My heart is broken.

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Jone always wanted a daughter. As the mom to two wonderful boys, there were times where adopting was discussed so there could be a daughter to raise. It never happened, so I earned the very proud title of “first daughter.” When I earned that title, I was rewarded with tremendous love. I’m so honored to have been Jone’s daughter. I knew I really was her daughter when a little more than a month after I got married in 1998, on my birthday, I received birthday flowers and a balloon. The balloon said, “Happy First Birthday.” It was my first birthday as Jone’s daughter. I felt very honored. I loved that balloon. I still have it folded up in a box.

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Grandma and Poppy Reeves were the first to arrive in the hospital for the arrival of both kids. There was no missing every possible minute they could have with our kids.

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When Cameron was a little more than a year old, Jone lived with me for a month in Michigan while Randy moved to work at Mizzou a month ahead of me. She helped me with a newly walking toddler while I tried to tie up loose ends, pack up the house and go. It could have been a very stressful time… But Jone backed me up.

I was an intense parent – especially when the kids were little. Jone was respectful to my domination as an alpha mommy. She always asked before she did a thing with the kids. I’m so glad I relaxed in the last few years. She’d always ask if the kids could have an extra snack, desert or gift. In recently years I always said yes. I know how grandmas love to spoil their grandbabies.

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When we found out Jordan was a girl, I can’t even explain how excited Jone was about the thought of a little girl coming into the family. When Jordan was born with her limb difference, I worried about the reaction. I don’t know why. Jone was nothing but thrilled and proud to help Jordan grow into the confident little monster she is today.

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Grandma Reeves was only 71. She was my biggest fan. She was the kids’ biggest fan. She loved this website and everything I posted about our family in every single space online. She was my constant “liker.” Look on this site… You will find very few posts without a Jone Reeves “like” on it. Visit my the Born Just Right Facebook page or my personal page and you’ll see non-stop likes. The support came from every platform. When I’d teach how one social network or online communication tool would work, Jone would jump into it with both feet first. I was her tech guru and she tried so hard to keep up with me.

I’m going to miss updating her digital photo frame and see her glowing pride of all of the new photos I posted for her.

I am so mad. I am so deeply sad. I’m crushed for the kids. I’m honored to have been with her in her final days… not for as long as I would have liked. But I’m so glad I could hold her hand a while longer. I was able to give her one more kiss and tell her I loved her.

Visitation is Monday, February 27th from 5pm to 8pm at Byrn Funeral Home in Mayfield, Kentucky. Funeral services are in the same location at 10am on Tuesday, February 28th. Instead of flowers, please consider donating to the American Cancer Society in honor of Jone Reeves.

I’ll miss you mom. Your family will be forever thankful for the deep love you shared with us. I know the kids are crushed. They miss you so very much.

10 Comments

  1. Duong Sheahan on February 26, 2012 at 2:01 pm

    I so feel all of your pain. A precious life lost to cancer & illness is really awful & words can’t describe the sorrow I feel for your family. May God’s comfort, peace and strength get each of you through this time. Cherish the beautiful memories…they never go away.

    Hugs to all,
    Duong

  2. Patti on February 26, 2012 at 2:56 pm

    i’m so sorry. cancer does, indeed, suck very much. *hugs*

  3. Elle on February 26, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    Jen, I’m so sorry to hear about your family’s loss. You’re so good about writing and blogging that you’ve maybe already done something similar, but when my mom’s parents died (I was 13), she wrote down all kinds of stories about her parents while they were fresh in her head. She gave them to me a few years ago, and I really treasure the time she took to preserve those memories. I know that Jordan and Cameron will feel the same way someday about entries like this one.

    Thoughts are with you, Randy and the kids.

  4. Danette Williams on February 26, 2012 at 7:05 pm

    Jen, I’m so sorry for your loss. I know your children will always cherish their memories of having a wonderful grandmother like Jone. May God comfort you and bless you during this difficult time. You’ll be in my prayers.

  5. joanna wyatt on February 26, 2012 at 8:43 pm

    I am so sorry for the loss of a very special lady. One day I stopped my there to leave some homemade pimento cheese for Charles . Jone and I were talking and she was telling me all about her grandkids. Our prayers are with ya

  6. Michelle Hodge on February 27, 2012 at 10:17 am

    Again, tears… this time at work. My heart is breaking for your family.

  7. Cyndi Kelly on February 27, 2012 at 11:53 am

    I’m so sorry for your family’s loss. It hurts to lose such a wonderful grandma. But, the cherished memories will never fade. God Bless you and your family….We will pray for strength for you all.

  8. Christine on February 28, 2012 at 1:34 pm

    Hey Jen,

    Like the tech guru you personally taught me to be, I have already reached out to you on FourSquare and Facebook. I also wanted to leave you a note on your blog, because I care. Your post was both so moving and touching. I never had the immense pleasure of meeting Mz. Jone, but your post did her justice. I now know she was a sweet, wonderful lady, always trying to keep up with the tech-savvy other Mrs. Reeves. What a character, she sounded so loving and genuine. I am so glad she was in your lives. I will be thinking about your family today.

    –Christine

  9. Barbara on March 13, 2012 at 1:23 pm

    Sincere sympathy. Recently my mother passed. Nothing like that loss.

    Also sorry I could not do a meet-up with at SXSW – I am just 50 mi so in SA.

    • Jen Lee Reeves on March 16, 2012 at 12:39 am

      Thanks for your support Barbara. I’m sorry I didn’t hold a meetup. I am back in Austin next week for a conference. Maybe I can put together a meetup somehow!

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